On a separate note, screw you. Screw you for wanting me to be a stupid weak doll. Screw you wallahi.

Screw you for causing me to be locked up and be left with nothing but the itch I have for you, magnified X100.

One day you stupid unipolar 'mature' man, you will realize that the amount you've fucked me up is light years beyond anything you ever imagined.

كل الشخصيات اللى اثرت فى حياتى وللأسف لسه بحبها

ممكن كلكوا مع بعضكوا كده تكتبوا كتاب

وتسموه "ازاى تحول بنى ادمه سعيده ومستقله لأنثى طفيلية تتغذى على الطبطبة".. مثلاً

الاكتئاب عامل زى نتيجة الانتخابات

لو رضيت بقواعد عالم ملحد, لازم تقبله



فى الحته دى

هنا

فى تيار اكتئاب شعبى

فى خنقة مشاعر مش عارفة اتكلم عنها

فى حرقة ومرارة بتعيد انتاج نفسها فى كوابيس يومية

فى كوابيس بقى ابداع فى البشاعة.. بمنطق فين يوجعك

فى حبسة بيت

ووحدة بتحدف فى اتجاه واحد

لإحساس اسمه عايزة ماما

فى محاولات تافهة لأنى اعرف اتعايش مع العجز ده

وامنى نفسى بأحلام ممكن تحصل وممكن تتسرق زى اى حاجة فى الدنيا

فى هوية ايمانية بحبها ومش عارفة اعيشها

مش بس عشان ظروف لكن عشان هوية تانية واطية جوايا

فى صيام دائم عن الحياه

فى عمق أم الهاوية

عينى تراك 

For The Record

God could have kept Daniel out of the lion's den...

He could have kept Paul and Silas out of jail...


He could have kept the three Hebrew children out of the fiery furnace..

But God has never promised to keep us out of hard places...

What He has promised is to go with us through every hard place, and to bring us through, with the utmost peace of his spirit inside us, and without a thought of doubt or fear, He promises us to be there, stick with us through it, and voluntarily share the pain, even the excruciating, gladly.
 
 
~Anonymous
 
 
a statement of belief
 
of a never ending, never diminishing, strong and outspoken god, who doesn't feed off rituality and the praise of mouth, a god who loves me through my ugliest and at moments where I don't even love myself.
 

half asleep with my nose in your the shoulder creases of your shirt

was cranky seconds ago, then smelled you and felt Okay

it feels relaxing to be 20kgs again

you drop me on the toilet seat, my legs swing lightly

my head is heavy, but inside my chest all is comfortably in place

I didn't know back then my smell made you feel Okay too

خيالات المساء المريضة

انا هكتب كتاب اسمه

"اشمعنى هى"